Breastfeeding for me has been a journey into the wonders of recourses my body can provide, and sharing this with with my son in a way that supports him to grow has been just magical. There have been lessons around spontaneity, slowing down and responding to needs that arise in each moment. There have been opportunities to listen to subtle cues; loud ones, within both my own body and relationship with my son. It’s been freeing to release expectations around what should be happening, or the routine that should be in place, and instead to exist in a state of flow. I feel empowered following a biological process that feels ancient and instinctual, guided by the invisible processes of a mechanism operating beyond conscious thought. It has made me think about a lot of other unconscious processes too, and taught me about how to listen to the needs of my own body in each moment.
I feel comfort in knowing that my milk can adapt to my child, such as making antibodies if we are sick, and there have been many times where only I have gotten ill, perhaps for this reason. I feel grateful for that, and also for the simplicity of having his food with us always. In the rush of organising life, especially with a smaller baby ( as my son is now 4), it was peaceful knowing that aspect of things was always covered. The night time cuddles have been so lovely too, and not having to get up or out of bed at night. The time and money saved seems small compared to our connection and long collection of quiet cuddly moments.